God Is Good: Stop Blaming Him for Things People Screw Up

It is interesting to go to church and actually have Jesus meet you there. The fact that he was elated to see me also floored me.  I have been so pissed off at Jesus for last few months because of some issues that have been plaguing my heart. I have been blaming God for some majorly awesome things that have gotten ruined because of human stupidity. Please bear in mind, that I do not subscribe to the idea of God’s Sovereignty in the way that many describe it as being. I do not believe that God has created us and the world as miniature puppets that he micromanages. When he gave us free will, I truly believe that it was given to us in totality, meaning that we have the ability to screw up the great opportunities that God will place in front of us. I believe that he always has our good in mind and orchestrates wonderful things for us ALL the time, not just some of the time. And I believe that I should expect great things from Him because He has always proved faithful in that area; which brings me to a few statements that are going to be hard for some to hear. First being, what God has for you is for you, and you can royally screw it up because of stupidity. Second being, if we are devastated by the things that don’t work out the way we thought they should have, maybe we should consider if we have put our faith in something OTHER than Jesus. Lastly, God is not to blame when others choose to act foolishly and we get hurt in the process. God gave us all the ability to choose…EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET. God is not to blame for tragedies that happen, or situations that get out of hand.

I will be the first to admit, God was the first person I blamed after getting fired from the job that he told me he was giving me. Simply put, things didn’t work out the way I had anticipated. I have NEVER EVER been fired from a job, so this felt absolutely shitty. Not to mention for some odd reason I felt as if the conditions for which I was fired were a breach of my ‘contract’ with the whole God being good thing. I put contract in quotes because I realize that is a major place of stinky thinking that has really been a huge factor in this whole ordeal. Nevertheless, I was absolutely pissed off. My fault, God’s fault, or their fault, I had gotten hurt massively. There were many thoughtless accusations thrown out but not as devastating as being accused of sleeping with one of the kids I was taking care of. In my bitter hurt, I blamed God for being the sole cause of the wrong I suffered. It has taken a few months, but after talking with one of my closest friends, I realized that God had become my scapegoat for my pain, not because He did anything wrong, but because we tend to lash out at those closest to us, blaming them for things that they never did. I had no one to lash out against because of the hurt. I sunk into a deep pit of depression and God well he was the asshole that I never wanted to talk to again. I mean how could he do that to me. Take me all the way to Texas just to allow this to happen? Was he trying to teach me something…? If so…that’s all kinds of abusive. Gone were the ideas of God’s goodness. They had been replaced with the idea that God was an abusive Father.  Even though I could definitely talk about how God was good all the time and had a theology centered on such a thing…my heart had been seared, Jesus was an asshole that I wanted nothing to do with. Why you ask? Because he let something so devastating happen to his kid.

Let me just put this out there; I do not think Jesus is an asshole, that was my hurt speaking. That was pain speaking that had no answers. I booked a trip to Oregon to visit my best friend. I knew the trip was going to be an awesome get away something that I needed, but something that I could bless her with as well. The Sunday right before Memorial Day, we got into a conversation about our hurts really beginning to sort out some major frustrations. In the middle of our talk, we both realized as if coming out of a foggy haze that God did not control the stupidity of those we are in relationship with. He doesn’t make their decisions for them. He always brings awesome opportunities to bless his kids; what they do with those blessings really is up to them. As I stated at the beginning of the blog, people have the ability to screw up the blessings that are brought into their lives because of stupidity. When that happens, it isn’t God’s will OR God’s fault. God is not abusive nor is he an asshole who wants to set his children up for failure. Yet, that is what religion subtly feeds us. If things do not happen the way in which perceive they should or something erratic happens, then the outcome was obviously God’s will, and we should not get upset or try to rectify the situation.

 I call BULLSHIT! I find this to be especially true when it comes to things involving interpersonal relationships. God isn’t playing a cosmic game of chess against himself, so I cannot sit here and believe that he is controlling someone else’ response to me or to a situation that involves me. I cannot sit here and believe that when God blesses us there are always strings attached.  I don’t think that when God invited me out to Texas saying that He had a job already waiting out there for me, that he was secretly thinking, “Alright guys, how can we royally screw Cordell over? How can we get his hopes up and then watch them crumble? I wonder….” I am pretty sure when He invited me out there; he was looking at the best possible scenario. One that factored in my growth in knowing him, in learning to love people, and causing my hope to continue to grow. I am not going to sit here and think that this was the BEST possible scenario, or what He had in mind for me when I went out there. I do think that because of the way things have turned out, he has been ever influential in working all things together for my good.

See, I am starting to realize that I got screwed over by PEOPLE not by God. See God never once slandered me, called me out of my name, picked on me, or lied to me. Actually in pretty much all circumstances He was the only one to give me a heads up as to what was going on behind the scenes. In fact it was Him that was always calming me down when I was frustrated with the treatment of other staff and kids that I was seeing. He was ever present, presenting strategies and ideas on how to love people even better. I do not like playing the blame game; however, I want to paint this picture as best as I can. The fact of the matter is that God was not at fault in any of this. I personally was only in control of how I responded to things. My getting fired was OUT of my control and it was the decision of others. See, my employers, at one point saw me as a blessing. Sadly, they did not understand how to treat the blessing that they had received. They made poor decisions which directly impacted me. But, that is what happens when you are in relationship with other people. God can hit you with a perfect setup pass, and the shot taken can be epically missed. This happens more often than we care to realize. Relationships are two way streets that can be messed up by either party even when you have Jesus at the center. Even when Jesus is trying to set up lovers, the lovers can screw up big time. I think it’s high time that I take Jesus off the hook. He always sets things up awesomely. It is not His fault if I fail to take the shot he set up for me, or if I miss the shot, or if the other person gets the pass and decides to let it go to the other team. I think it’s time to start taking responsibility for the things that we are capable of doing.

No it is not God’s will for people to be hurt, sick, frustrated, and miserable or anything like that. That is my stance. He has made all provision for us to be successful with what we have. However, choosing to be responsible for the things given to us is something altogether different. Many would like to sit around and point the finger, blame God, and the like, but is it really God’s fault? The conclusion of the matter is this for me. My previous employers made a stupid decision in getting rid of me. If they only could have realized what they had, but it is too late now. Now someone else is going to benefit greatly from my expertise and knowledge. They let go of something amazing that God had sent to them. Ah well, their loss not mine. I have better things in front of me. No looking back.

I leave you with this…what are you still blaming God for? Is it time for you stop blaming Him? Is it time for you to own your responsibility? Is it time for you to maybe give God a fair chance? Maybe you will find out that he is a lot more AWESOME than you ever realized. Maybe you will find out that he isn’t anything like what people have made Him out to be. Maybe you will find the freedom to ask the questions that people are afraid to ask. My hope is that you find the strength to pick yourself up and continue moving forward.

Fellowship, Tithing, and Going to Church: My Frustrations with Modern Day Christianity

I cannot promise that this will end up being a short post. As you might have figured, frustration is what is fueling this post. Well, in all honesty, the frustration has died off a bit. My mind is much clearer so I can put together coherent thoughts that will more accurately convey what I am observing.

Fellowship, tithing, and going to church, are ideas that have been brought up frequently in the last month. Through many of these conversations, it has been made clear that there seems to be a grave misunderstanding with the use of such phrases. Within many of the circles I have been a part of, these words share a distinct relationship. Growing in a Christian house hold…we went to church to fellowship and pay our tithes. This would be a valid summary of what many other people have grown up under. However, this understanding of things is what causes such a dependence and obligation to religious system. What this spells out is RELIGIOUS DUTY AND OBLIGATION. If you do not perform…well…you miss out on the blessings that God has for you.

Recently, I did a bible study with close friends and we decided that the best topic to cover would be the idea of fellowship. Most if not all who were present for the study are what I would call church escapees or rebels. All of us have grown up within the confines of a shallow and narrow understanding of why we are “supposed” to go to church. All of us had the same scripture quote pop in our heads. “Do not forsake the assembling of yourselves,” is what popped into each one of our minds. This has been the most “crippling” proof text about why we have to be “in” church. In my snarkiness I decided to raise the question…, “Doesn't this count for assembling ourselves?” There was a small pause, but it was a unanimous decision. What we were doing constituted a “church” gathering…what’s more is that we were breaking bread together…OH MY GOODNESS we were being BIBLICAL?!?! You mean to tell me, we were being scripturally accurate without actually going to a “church”.  What’s more we were delving into things at what I would say was a higher level and more importantly, we were getting to know one another more intimately.

It was at that point that we realized true fellowship was happening. We were being intentional about being in each other’s lives, heading towards a common goal, from a common denominator. At someone some asked the question, “Does fellowship actually really happen at church?” We all looked at each other for a moment, before we all started laughing. Apparently there was an understanding that though we grew up in church, fellowship like we were experiencing currently NEVER had happened while we were doing our Sunday morning duties. Fellowship typically happened outside of the church setting, and found its home in the normal day to day things of life. We understood that fellowship requires intentionality and does not happen at an intimate place without that intentionality. Am I saying don’t go to church? Absolutely not! I am saying that if you are going to church for fellowship…you are probably not going to miss it.

I mean really…from what I have noticed church fellowship is akin to going to high school. Got your introductory things to wake you up, then got your announcements, got a few activities that involve others, then you are in your seat listening to the professor talk at you for a good 30 minutes to an hour. Then we are let out of our seats to go home. On the way home, we may see a few of our friends and others we haven’t seen in a while. We will put on a smile, exchange some small talk, grab our families and head of to watch the game, get dinner, or sleep. In what part of that has fellowship actually occurred? At what part have we invested in relationship? Yes we invested vertically, but have we invested horizontally? UH…probably not. Also, when I talk about fellowship words like partnership and participation help to clarify what I mean. Fellowship in my understanding means that we are becoming partners in each other’s lives, actively participating in the growth development and furthering of our lives as individuals as well as the moving forward of the Kingdom we say we are a part of.

Then another interesting thought came to mind, how do we actually begin to invest I the lives of those we are in fellowship with? That is where the monkey wrench of TITHING came into the picture. I am just going to say this right now…I do not believe in tithing PERIOD. I think tithing is so below the standard of Kingdom living, that it ought to be illegal. Yes, I admit I have strong feelings concerning this. However, my opinion is not without merit. Does anyone know what the TITHE actually is? If you are saying that it is 10% of your income…you are actually WRONG! VERY WRONG! My buddy Nathan wrote an excellent blog concerning this topic. Many people are ignorant concerning what the tithe is and what is was actually supposed to be used for. As such many put themselves in an unfavorable position because they are missing out on some major spiritual principles and things they are not legally bound too since they are not Jews. Secondly, they are functioning way under the Kingdom standard because it is based upon an inferior and NOW obsolete covenant. I will detail what I mean concerning that in another blog. There are major differences between the Old Covenant and the New Covenant. The most major difference being that the compulsion we were under to carry out certain deeds was rendered impotent when the New Covenant of God’s grace was given. We now do things out of our heart not out of obligation.

So then what do you do with all that extra cash that’s lying around? GIVE IT AWAY CHEERFULLY. See the tithe was a mandatory thing. Now, we have the opportunity to give it away freely, cheerfully, and abundantly. We are not put in a place of responsibility to give based upon how we actually see God and understand Him. It really is an exercise of our heart more than it is a test of our obedience. Do we believe that God really functions from abundance and loves funneling that abundance through us…or do we believe he functions from a budget? Giving frees us up to give without restriction. Rather than simply doing our duty to give 10% of our produce and livestock, we are no able to give EVEN MORE! See God’s kids should be known to be the most GENEROUS, LOVING, GRACIOUS, and KIND people, on the face of the planet.  However, is that what people really see?

Here in lies my frustration with going to “church” and dealing with Christianity as a whole. I really love people. I absolutely love seeing people living in freedom. I love seeing they eyes of people light up as truth begins to shatter the coke bottle lenses they had been forced to wear for so long. I love watching people drunkenly come to the reality that they are free from condemnation and shame. Even better as I see people take their chains and burn them, then find another to help them do the same thing. Do I want to see things change? YES! Yet, for the church to change…those who run the churches are going to have to realize that they are no different from any of the other sheep within their congregations. There is only one shepherd. His name is Jesus. The rest of us are HIS sheep. One thing I would not is this…Pastors, Prophets, Apostles, Evangelist, Teacher’s, if you are claiming to be a part of the five-fold ministry team…you are at best a bell-sheep. You will NEVER be the shepherd. There is a story concerning the wayward lamb that becomes the bell sheep. However, being a bell sheep in the way that I am using it requires intimacy and transparency with the shepherd. It is time spent with the shepherd but never forgetting the relationship. Though a bell sheep, you are still a sheep. You are no different than any other sheep of the flock. Never forget that. The playing field is level across the board. We must learn to lead among rather than leading from a position. The mentality of who will be the greatest in the Kingdom is a HUGE problem within the church. We have forgotten the words of Christ. The greatest among you will be the servant of all.

A person I know typically gets mad at me for sharing things like this because they see it as easy to diagnose the problem. They always ask me so what are you going to do about the problem. People perish for lack of knowledge. So the first thing is bring this stuff to the light. Secondly, invest intimately and actually cultivate meaningful relationships that challenge the status quo in the church. Empower people to ask question. Help people find the confidence to challenge norms. Remind people to take the tape off of their mouths. It is time for the conversation to go from a whisper to a passionate plea.

Here is a link to my buddy Nathan's Blog concerning tithing.

 http://www.benotcommon.com/tithingvsgiving.html